I've had a lot of different thoughts going through my head over the last day or so, and since I can't share those thoughts with friends on msn for a few days, I decided to come to the library to post about them. First of all, I had a second job interview at Day & Ross last night. It seems likely that they'll hire me, but I'm still not sure how much I want to work nights. It would be Monday to Friday from 5:15 to 1:30 am with a few hours overtime during busy seasons, so needless to say my social life will come to a hault if I take the job. That would mean no more chatting on msn in evenings (when most of you are online) and even worse, no more helping with youth. The idea of having to work Tuesday nights really saddens me, because I've come to love working with the teens and I enjoy hanging out with J-Ro and Jess afterwords. But I guess that's the price you pay when you want to earn money. It's a cycle. Either you have money and no free time, or lots of free time and no money. Anyways, I guess it won't hurt to try the job since there's a three month probation period before they hire you for good. I'll continue to pray about it and if anyone else wants to pray for me, that would be greatly appreciated. Who knows, maybe I'll get a job offer from McCain's or somewhere else.

I also started reading a book that Jess lent me last night (I forget the name already, yeah my memory is THAT bad) and was surprised that the first chapter was actually pretty violent and depressing. Still good though, and the end of the chapter was really good and made me think. It reminded me that God provides no matter what situation you're in. Needless to say I can't wait to read more. I also watched the first half of Gandhi last night. I figured I'd be bored out of my mind, but it's actually very interesting and seeing how Gandhi lived really made me think about my life as a Christian. He never stepped back from his opponents even when they struck him in violence. He fought back with words and tried to make peace with everyone. Truly an amazing man. Anyways, between the book and the movie I had a lot on my mind.

Also, I see Narnia is hitting theatres this weekend. Is anyone planning on going to see it in the next week or two? Because I'd be glad to have people to go with besides just myself. Heck, maybe I can even convince J-Ro to go if other people are going. Please, let me know if you want to go either by commenting here (I'll check my blog again tomorrow) or calling me. My phone number is 375-6219 for those who don't know.

Finally, I've become completely obsessed with Radiohead (A British band that Coldplay ripped off). What really shocks me is how I hated them when I was a teen, but now I can't get over their sound. In fact, I just took out one of their albums from the library. I suggest that any of you who like Coldplay check out Radiohead's OK Computer and The Bends albums. Especially these songs: Fake Plastic Trees, High & Dry, Just, Street Spirit (Fade Out), Paranoid Android, Karma Police and No Surprises.

That is all for now. Hopefully I'll be back on msn in a few days.

My computer has bit the dust.

Well, the fan on my computer is finally dead, so I just thought I'd let everyone know that until I get a new fan installed or a new computer I probably won't be posting very often (only when I go to the library) and will likely not be on msn at all. Without the fan running my computer just freezes up after about 15 minutes. So that's that I guess. I'll catch up with everyone whenever I can.

lyrics of the week.

Stand Inside Your Love - The Smashing Pumpkins

You and me
Meant to be
Immutable
Impossible
It's destiny
Pure lunacy
Incalculable
Insufferable
But for the last time
You're everything that I want and ask for
You're all that I'd dreamed
Who wouldn't be the one you love
Who wouldn't stand inside your love
Protected and the lover of
A pure soul and beautiful you
Don't understand
Don't feel me now
I will breathe
For the both of us
Travel the world
Traverse the skies
Your home is here
Within my heart
And for the first time
I feel as though I am reborn
In my mind
Recast as child and mystic sage
Who wouldn't be the one you love
Who wouldn't stand inside your love
And for the first time
I'm telling you how much I need and bleed for
Your every move and waking sound
In my time
I'll wrap my wire around your heart and your mind
You're mine forever now
Who wouldn't be the one you love and live for
Who wouldn't stand inside your love and die for
Who wouldn't be the one you love

An interesting experience.

First of all I'll just say that I'm having a ton of connection problems, so if anyone wonders why I'm not on msn much or fail to update my blog, that's why. Stupid Aernet...anyways, on to my post. Yesterday I had the first job interview that I've had in over a year, and it went alright I guess. My dad has been bugging me to take a resume into Day & Ross for quite awhile now, so I finally took one in the other day. My parents wanted me to give it to whoever was in charge of hiring, but that person was out so I just handed it to the person at the front desk. I didn't really expect to get a call back merely an hour later (heck, I didn't expect to be called back at all), but call back they did. What was really odd was the guy asked me what day and time would be good for me. I was rather confused by this and it took me a minute to respond. So yesterday morning I went to my interview. After waiting at the front desk for a few minutes the guy in charge of hiring came and took me through the kahsi'r (sorry, Pepper jumped on the keyboard. I'll leave that in for effect) building. It was rather interesting walking through the building, despite the fact that I've been in it before when my dad was painting the offices. Once we got to his office he asked me what position I was applying for and then had me fill out this sheet of paper. It had a bunch of different qualities and I had to check the ones that I thought others would think would be important in me. It was kinda weird at first, and I had to fill out the same thing twice. I guess they use it to see if you check the same qualities. Anyways, after that he had me do a typing test to see what my wpm is. I was really stupid and didn't practice or anything beforehand, but maybe it was better that way. I thought I did pretty poorly since I'm not used to typing as fast and accurately as possible for five minutes straight, but I managed to average 58 wpm with 97% accuracy. Way better than I expected and the guy seemed impressed when he told me how I did. Next he took me to a cubicle and I had to do a series of tests. The first involved a series of two numbers in a column and I had to check whether they were the same or different. I did pretty good, but didn't manage to finish them all in the four minute time limit. Next I had a piece of paper with a series of numbers in different patterns and I had to figure out the pattern and write the next two numbers in order. Pretty easy at first but there were a couple that stumped me and I only got half way through before time ran out. And finally I had a test with a bunch of math and word problems and had to write the answers. I only got half way through this one too, but hopefully getting answers right makes up for not finishing. That was pretty much all there was to my interview. He told me to call another guy tonight to see what my outcome was on the tests, so I'll just have to wait to see what this guy has to say. I still don't know if I want the job that badly. It could mean no more helping out at youth and I wouldn't be able to chat on msn with my friends (since most of them are online at night), but at least I'd finally have an income. And I also won't be able to go to Ontario if I start work, but I guess I won't worry until I see if I got the job. Anyways, I'll stop rambling now. I have to try to get ahold of J-Ro so I can drag him to J-Hop's birthday party. Oh, I also cancelled my preorder of Guitar Hero because frickin EB was ticking me off by constantly changing the date that they're getting it in. I ordered it online which means I'll have to pay $40+ more, but at least I'll have it by the end of next week. And yes, I realize I crammed everything into a single paragraph, but I'm lazy today and don't feel like paying attention to proper writing.

Alright, this isn't much of a post, but there's something I need help with so I figured I'd see if any of my commenters can help. I want to get pics from my digital camera developed, but how do I do that? Do I take the memory card to the Superstore? Or email the pics to them? Or what? I have no idea and I'm getting way too many pics on my computer. Any help would be appreciated.

A change of mind

After giving it some thought (and talking about it with Jess on msn) I've decided that I SHOULD go to Ontario with my family. Everyone's right, I should be with family during Christmas, not sitting at home by myself for a week (although I'm sure I would've spent a little time with my sister, Jonathan, Josh and my grandparents). I'll have time to hang out with friends at some point during the holidays, and chances are everyone would be too busy with family to do anything that week anyways. The other reason I decided I should go is my grandma told my mom "I wish I could see Douglas one more time". How can I stay home after hearing that? So I'll put aside my dislike of the 16 hour drive and go with my family to Fergus for a week. By going to Ontario I also get to celebrate Christmas twice, so it's not like I had any reason to complain in the first place. I can even update my blog at the library in Fergus so everyone knows what's new. Oh, and Adam, you'll have to let me know when you and Luiza will be home, so that we can plan to go see King Kong and maybe do other stuff.

Robert Jordan finally writes another good book.

Out of complete boredom this weekend I went out and bought the newest Wheel of Time book. At first it was the same old slow stuff with me trying desperately to remember who these hundreds of characters are. But surprisingly it started getting good. There's actually action again and even more surprising is that plot lines that have been going on for three books or more are FINALLY getting conclusions. About frickin time Jordan! I'm sure those who have given up on the series won't bother, but for me I'm glad that the story is finally moving after it went to crap in the last three or four books. I'm also loving the little romance going on with Mat and the daughter of the Nine Moons. It's taken so long to get going that it's nice finally seeing where it's going. And it's humerous as well. Anyways, this book is helping me get over my boredom so I'm (bloody) happy. Only two more years until this series comes to a deserved end. 12 books and 11,000+ pages? Insanity!

Feeling a little stressed out.

It's been a crazy last few days, mixed with boredom and insanity. The mixture of stress over trying to sell the 360 and boredom of sitting at home doing nothing two days straight has taken it's toll. After spending the entire day sitting in front of the computer I had to get out, even though I didn't have anyone to do things with. So I went to the Superstore and bought the new Wheel of Time book (book 11. What's this? 14,000 pages read so far?) and then I went to Movie Gallery and chatted with Darrek and Paul for a bit before renting This Is Spinal Tap. Sure, it wasn't really an exciting trip, and it involved me spending money, but at least it got me out of the house for a bit. Isn't it sad how I must spend money in order to be entertained? Isn't there some way to keep myself preoccupied that doesn't involve spending money? I'd hang out with friends if I had any in the area, but everyone has moved away and the only places to make new friends are at bars or other churchs. But maybe having more friends wouldn't make a huge difference. Having a bunch of friends probably wouldn't mean I'd actually have something to do. Chances are they'd be too busy to hang out more than once a week, so I'd still be bored to death on weekends. Anyways, I'm just stressed out and feeling kinda depressed, so I'll just leave it at that. Anyone have any thoughts?

Updated Thursday morning. Added some thoughts on yesterdays events. Just so those who have already read this post know.

Just a few things I thought I'd share.

1. Hugo (the guy threatening to sue me) is a jerk. After his long nasty email I sent him a nice apology(which he didn't deserve) and sent the parcel with tons of insurance and nicely packaged and sent him another nice email telling him it's on its way and then he emails me back saying "thank YOU!" sarcastically. Jerk.

2. I'm not dating anybody, so those of you saying I should date *insert name here* can give up now. please k thanks. I've decided that it's much easier and less stressful just being single the rest of my life. Don't have to get all nervous at the idea of asking somebody out and potentially ruin a friendship or something.

3. J-Ro seemed kinda moody last night. And for a guy wanting a massage he wasn't being very nice to the person he was asking. Calling Jess a fat fish and other things. He didn't deserve that hug and when I told him that after we left he said that it's because he's so charming to girls. He needs a rude awakening or something.

4. But thanks to him I now know how to choose my blog layout, so I was finally able to get rid of that boring bland one I had. I wasn't about to choose pink (Jess and Josh both have that color anyways) so I chose my favorite color.

5. But it got rid of all my links, so I have to do that all over again. *shakes fist at blogger*

6. I think I'm going to Freddy today to see Harry Potter again. Hopefully EB will get Guitar Hero in today. If not I'm going to Bum Rush the employees (Final Fantasy VI reference for those who are thinking odd things).

7. I feel like kicking myself in the nuts for not buying a 360. They're fetching $2000+ on ebay now. $1500 profit is nothing to scoff at.

8. Jody is coming home tonight. Too bad I probably won't see him until the weekend or at church. Here's hoping he has time to hang out.

9. I'm sure J-Ro will bug him if he's busy or not, so maybe I can just make sure I'm around J-Ro all weekend. Probably not.

10. I'll likely update tonight if I get Guitar Hero.
_____________________________________________________________

11. And I wasn't able to get one. Screw you EB! And I didn't bum rush the employees, which is probably a good thing.

12. Ohh Emm Gee! I frickin got a 360 yesterday. Time to hit up Ebay and see what I can get. Mad props to Heidi for the heads up on Superstore selling them. The gamer in me is saying to open it up and start playing, but the grim reality is I need money badly and can't afford to keep the 360 for myself. Unfortunately the value seems to have dropped to $1100. Still nothing to scoff at I guess.

13. Yesterday was crazy. After the 360 experience I went to Freddy, bought a couple of games to put in the auction, hung out with Greg and his siblings, and went and saw Harry Potter with Hooper and Whitey. Fun stuff.

14. The drive home was pretty exhausting though. Luckily the roads weren't TOO bad.

15. It was worth it when I got to Woodstock though. Nothing beats driving through Woodstock at 12 in the morning with snow falling everywhere and all the pretty decorations lit up. Really felt like Christmas.

16. And then when I got out of town and on my road I started cursing winter again. I hate bad roads and my road was covered in snow and slippery.

17. Knowing Jody was probably home was really exciting, even though I might not see him until Sunday morning.

leetspeak for you n00bs.

Commonly used words

QFT - Quoted for truth
FTW - For the win
1337 - leet or elite
haxX0r - hacker
phear or ph33r - fear
tekniq - technique
teh - the
t00l - tool
n00b - newbie
pwn - own
pwn3d - owned
j00 - you
suxX0rz - sucks
ruxXorz - rocks
fuXx0rz - the f bomb
w00t - woot

OMG, WTF, BBQSauce and/or Burnsauce are quite often used together.

Always include 1 and "one" in place of exclamation marks

the is always misspelled "teh"

certain numbers are used in place of letters.

A = 4
E = 3
I = 1
S = 5
T = 7

Here's an extreme example:

1 ruXx0rz l1k3 4 1337 h4xX0r5 4nd OMFGWTFBBQSauce n00b ch33k 0u7 /\/\y w3b 51t3 l1k3 n0W!!1one I 4M t3h 1337 haxX0rz u n00b!one1 j00 have been pwn3d1

which translates to something like what you see below.

I rock like an elite hacker and newbie check out my web site like now. I am the elite hacker you newbie. You have been owned.

Looks like I might get sued.

Well, I probably won't, but I just got threatened by an ebayer. I find it all very humerous, because all that happened was I sent the guy the wrong amount for shipping and emailed him back immediately saying it's $4 more than what I originally said. I made a mistake, so I wasn't going to get upset if he didn't want to pay the difference, but I didn't really expect him to get angry and threaten to sue. I guess if people can sue McDonalds for making them fat than they can sue somebody for asking them to pay an additional $4. Anyways, I sent back a nice email appologizing for my mistake and saying that I'd send the game system as soon as possible tomorrow morning. Here's hoping he gets it in a timely manner so that I can forget about this idiot. And I'm totally expecting negative feedback for this, so I look forward to screwing up his "perfect rating" that he told me not to mess up. Ebay is crazy. I might forget about it after this.

Miyazaki appreciation post

Because it's been awhile since I've pushed his films at people and everyone needs to give them a chance at least once. Sure, you can pass it off as "anime", but you're missing out on something that most Disney movies can't even surpass. These aren't merely "cartoons". They are real movies that use the animation medium to create worlds and characters that can't even be created by visual effects. These movies are moving just like dramas can be, have characters that you can relate to, and are just happy and make you feel good (well, maybe not Grave of the Fireflies). So if you enjoy movies, then please give these a chance. Rent them, or borrow them (I own all of his films), or heck, watch them with me. I'm always up to watching them again. OK, I'll shut up now and just leave you with summaries of each one.

EDIT: I should point out that I didn't write these summaries. They're taken from rottentomatoes.com. I was too lazy to write up my own summaries.

Nausicaa of the Valley of the Wind - 1984 - My score: 8/10

An epic, environmentally conscious film, takes viewers on a voyage through time and space to the magical and dreamlike Valley of the Wind, where good battles evil for the future of the human race. Faced with almost certain destruction of her planet's natural resources, the warrior Princess Nausicaa must rally her people against an evil queen's brutal army to bring a new life to her homeland.

Castle in the Sky - 1986 - My score: 9/10

A rousing adventure that follows an orphan named Sheeta as she eludes the clutches of a secret agent named Muska while trying to discern her family's history. After her first escape from Muska, Sheeta meets up with a young boy named Pazu, whose father, a photographer, was disgraced after he took a picture of the legendary flying island of Laputa and had it dismissed as a hoax. When the two realize that a family heirloom Sheeta carries allows them to levitate, the two begin a search for the lost island, trailed by Muska, who is also searching for Laputa.

My Neighbor Totoro - 1988 - My score: 10/10

A slower-paced, stunningly realistic portrayal of life in the countryside. When their mother is hospitalized because of an unspecified illness, two young sisters spend a summer in the Japanese countryside with their father. The children's strange new environment turns out to be a natural wonderland filled with exotic real-life creatures and a trio of furry, woodland sprites who can only be seen by children. The film evokes both the terrors and wonders that children can experience unbeknownst to adults--a feeling the young Miyazaki knew only too well after his mother was hospitalized because of spinal tuberculosis. With homages to Alice in Wonderland and Mary Poppins.

Grave of the Fireflies - 1988 - My score: 9/10

In post-World War II Japan, a janitor finds a deathly ill boy lying beside a metal candy container. The janitor unwittingly tosses the possession into the night, beginning a most unusual tale of survival set amid the atrocities of war. Brother and sister Seita and Setsuko, ages 14 and 4, flee their disheveled home and deceased parents to make their bid for a new life. Before American troops begin to occupy their country, the children resort to dwelling in an abandoned bomb shelter in the countryside. Though these siblings later get a sense of safety, they realize necessities such as food and water will not be easy to come by.

Kiki's Delivery Service - 1989 - My score: 8/10

Set in a time when airships still ruled the skies and World War II never happened, Kiki's Delivery Service is a coming-of-age tale that explores the difficulties of being a young witch. On her thirteenth birthday, budding witch Kiki is in a hurry to leave her family and establish her independence. With only her talking pet cat as a companion, Kiki is attracted to the bright lights of a beautiful port city, but finds that making friends is not easy. Using her skill at riding a broom to start an express delivery service, Kiki quickly discovers that she cannot take her unique abilities for granted.

Porco Rosso - 1992 - My score: 9/10

A period, fantasy film about an Italian, ace WWI pilot who undergoes a transformation to become Porco Rosso, part man, part pig, after witnessing the deaths of other pilots in his last air battle. Under this spell, Porco Rosso survives by taking odd jobs, and finds himself in one comic situation after another as he romances women, rescues the innocent, and looks for a way out of the porcine spell.

Princess Mononoke - 1997 - My score: 9/10

A beautifully realized tale of civilization versus nature, Princess Mononoke is a true epic. While protecting his village from a rampaging boar-god, the warrior Ashitaka is cursed with a rapidly spreading scar that threatens to end his life. Seeking a cure and a reason for the animal-god's attack, he journeys into the sacred depths of the Great Forest Spirit's realm. On the edge of this once serene forest, however, the Tatara clan have begun to destroy the surrounding land to produce iron. In retaliation, San, the adopted daughter of the wolf-god Moro, has begun raiding the Tatara fortress to stop their encroachment. Soon Ashitaka is caught in the middle and must stop the war between the humans and the forest dwellers before they destroy each other.

Spirited Away - 2001 - My score: 10/10

Spirited Away is the tale of Chihiro, a young girl who is taken down an unusual road by her parents while moving to a new home in an unfamiliar town. The curiosity of Chihiro's mother and father leads the reluctant child into what appears to be an abandoned amusement park. Soon her parents are greedily feasting on various delights from an enticing food stand and are literally turned into pigs. The frightened and bewildered girl then encounters a young man named Haku, who explains what she must do to navigate this strange and magical realm. Finding employment in a bathhouse for spirits and other odd characters Chihiro attempts to figure out how she can free her parents from the clutches of the resort's owner, a powerful witch named Yubaba. In the process, she makes some very eccentric friends.

Howl's Moving Castle - 2004 - My score: 9/10

Sophie, an average teenage girl working in a hat shop, finds her life thrown into turmoil when she is literally swept off her feet by a handsome-but-mysterious wizard named Howl, and is subsequently turned into a 90-year old woman by the vain and conniving Wicked Witch of the Waste. Embarking on an incredible odyssey to lift the curse, she finds refuge in Howl's magical moving castle where she becomes acquainted with Markl, Howl's apprentice, and a hot-headed fire demon named Calcifer. Sophie's love and support comes to have a major impact on Howl, who flies in the face of orders from the palace to become a pawn of war and instead risks his life to help bring peace to the kingdom.

J-Ro, Becky and Darrek suck!

Update your stinking blogs! I need stuff to comment on! And I know J-Ro doesn't read my blog. He told me himself that the only blog he reads is Becky's. Who wants to help me beat him up? Anyone? Oh, and Darrek doesn't suck quite as much as the other two, since he DOES update every once in awhile and he's fairly new to this, so I'll give him a break.

Atlantic Cinemas actually getting good movies?

Yes, two posts in one day. I wanted to get both of these posts out of the way. Anyways. Atlantic Cinemas (Woodstock's crappy theatre) is finally getting some good movies this upcoming weekend. The last good movie I saw there was Wallace & Gromit, so it's nice that they have gotten another movie that I actually want to see. That movie is Walk the Line. I don't really have any interest in Johnny Cash whatsoever, but I'm a sucker for a drama with good acting, and word is the performances from Joaquin Phoenix and Reese Witherspoon are spectacular so it sounds like something I'd like. Is anyone interested in going with me to see this? If so then just let me know. I'll probably go see it on Saturday or Sunday afternoon, since I'll be busy in the evenings this weekend (youth stuff going on). They're also getting Harry Potter, but I think I'm going to Freddy to see that with Hooper sometime next week. Another movie that I wouldn't mind seeing is Pride & Prejudice, but unless I find someone to go with I'll probably just wait for it to come out on video. I'm not sure I'd go to a romantic drama on my own and the likeliness of them getting it at the local theatre is pretty slim.

My speech on Cassie Bernall.

I was telling Krystal about this on msn, and I think she said something about being interested in seeing it (my bad memory mixed with being tired doesn't go well), so I'm posting this speech that I did back in College. Maybe other people will find it interesting as well.

April 20, 1999 – a day that forever changed a great number of lives in Littleton, Colorado. The day that Cassie Bernall was brutally killed in the shootings at Columbine High School. This is the true story of a 17 year old teenager who had just recently turned from walking a similar path as that of her killers.

The following is what happened to Cassie that day as pieced together by her family and friends.
Cassie had a difficult time getting out of bed that morning having stayed up late the night before working on her homework. Her cat’s litter box needed cleaning and breakfast was late but she still managed to leave for school at approximately 7:30 a.m., having quickly mumbled I love you to her mother.

It was about 11:15 when she walked into the high school library, with her backpack on her shoulder to work on her homework assignment. She had been there maybe five minutes when a teacher came running into the room, yelling that there were kids with guns in the hall. A lot of students thought it was a senior prank but then shots were heard coming from down the hall. Then a student came in and dropped to the floor with blood all over his shoulder. Everyone hid under the tables as fast as possible. The teacher frantically called 911. Then the two killers, Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold, came into the library, shooting and shouting things like, and I quote, “We’ve been waiting to do this our whole lives.”, and cheering after each shot.

The outstanding witness to Cassie’s last moments was a teenager named Josh who did not see but heard Cassie’s confrontation with the killers. And I quote, “I couldn’t see anything when those guys came up to Cassie, but I could recognize her voice. I could hear everything like it was right next to me. One of them asked her if she believed in God. She paused, like she didn’t know what she was going to answer, and then she said yes. She must have been scared, but her voice did not sound shaky. It was strong. Then they asked her why, though they didn’t give her a chance to respond. They just blew her away.”

One of the first officials on the scene the next day was an investigator from the Jefferson County sheriff’s department. He recalls seeing Cassie immediately upon entering the library. She was lying under a table close to another girl. Cassie had been shot in the head at very close range, the muzzle had apparently been touching her skin. She had been killed instantly.
Thirteen people perished in the shootings at Columbine High before their young killers turned their guns on themselves.

Cassie Bernall was born only six miles from where she was laid to rest 17 years later. A daddy’s girl in every way, she was a happy, active child growing up; part of a close knit family with her adored father, mother and younger brother. But somewhere along the way Cassie changed and when she turned 15 all that her parents knew was that she seemed distant. Then by chance her mother, Misty Bernall, found letters written to Cassie by her best friend that shocked Misty to the core of her heart. Unspeakable sex talk, but even more horrifying, death threats to teachers with occultic drawings and symbols. Perhaps the most shocking of all were grisly illustrations depicting Cassie’s parents being brutally murdered. Faced with these facts, Cassie’s parents had no choice but to contact the sheriff’s department and their pastor and in doing so started a chain of events that proved overwhelmingly difficult for them.

This was the start of Cassie’s escape from a rage that was slowly consuming her and from the influence of the people who she had surrounded herself with. During this time of approximately 3 months Cassie screamed, cut her wrists and fought all who tried to help her. Cassie’s parents had placed her in a private Christian school and in the spring of 1997 a new friend from the school invited Cassie to a youth retreat. Cassie returned home from this event a changed girl.
The spiritual awakening which Cassie experienced there gave her hope, and her about-face was startling. She developed a quiet, caring attitude, not pushing her faith on anyone; developing many new friendships with her constant smile. Her parents allowed her to transfer to Columbine High School in September 1997.

To understand the girl Cassie was on the day of her death, we can look to what her friends had to say about her. One young friend said, and I quote, “With some friends, you have to hide things or else you’d be scared of ruining your reputation. Cassie was so real, so honest about her struggles. We could talk about stuff that bothered us, and we didn’t have to look good for each other.”

Cassie spent a lot of time reading a certain book during the last two months of her life. Seeking Peace – It was a book that her youth group was studying. Cassie’s parents found great comfort in noting the numerous passages of this book that she had highlighted. One passage of particular interest to Cassie was of Martin Luther King. And I quote, “No man is free if he fears death, but the minute that you conquer the fear of death, at that moment you are free…I submit to you that if a man hasn’t discovered something that he will die for, he isn’t fit to live.”

On that fateful day in April, 1999, there were other acts of courage. This story of Cassie Bernall is just one. A young girl who, as a result of a personal battle with self-hate and anger, was ready to say “yes” to her killers.

J-Ro is a girl, It's fun being a Settler, and He-Man is unintentionally funny.

It's a good thing J-Ro doesn't read my blog. haha. I just thought I'd share some of the stuff that happened yesterday. Yesterday I was bored (what a surprise) so I called J-Ro to see what he was doing. He wanted to go out to see Becky, so I figured what the heck, might as well give him a ride since it'd also give me something to do. First we went to his place so he could put some songs on his i-Pod, and then we went to KFC so he could get some snackage. We would've seen if Jess wanted to go to Becky's with us, but I knew she had gone away for the weekend. Oh well, maybe we can do it again the next time Becky's home.

Anyways, after KFC we went out to Becky's. When we got there I watched them eat KFC (flaming death!) and Becky forced me to eat a fry. Even though I was already full! I also made a small negative comment towards the Star Wars prequels, and she punched me. She's so violent. Then we played some Goldeneye and Mario Kart 64. Considering all I've heard about how good Becky is at Goldeneye, she never really killed me in points. In fact, when J-Ro joined in and we played three player I believe she came in last in points. Unless she was really rusty, I think Joe could've smoked her, regardless of what J-Ro says. Next we played some Mario Kart 64. A game that never gets old. After a few races of that I got He-Man out (yeah, my little brothers' birthday present. They don't mind though. hehe) and J-Ro and Becky got to see just how funny the show is. I can't get that awesome 80s theme song out of my head! LOL!

After watching a few episodes of He-Man, J-Ro started complaining about how he needed a massage (does he always ask girls to do that? He just likes the attention I think). Becky gave him a massage for awhile and it then turned into a "tickle J-Ro" competition, with Becky, her little sister and I ambushing J-Ro for like 30 minutes. It's funny how he squeals like a little girl (or maybe a japanese schoolgirl? lol). After that got old we played a game (called Settlers) with Becky's dad. It seemed to be a great game, but by the time I was starting to figure out how to play everyone else had overwhelmed me and the game was over. I could see myself getting into it though. Maybe I'll pick it up for my dad's birthday. After the game ended J-Ro and I said our farewells and since it was late and I hadn't had supper, I decided to go to Subway. There I had a footlong sub (whole wheat, Jess!! No flaming death for me*fails to mention eating donuts at Tim's the night before*). It's been way too long since I had a sub. Those salads were getting old, although they're still good.

After eating I took J-Ro home and that's about all that happened that is interesting. It was a fun day for sure. Hopefully next time some other people will be around. The rest of the weekend will probably be uneventful and boring (like always!), so I'll take a break from posting until something interesting takes place (maybe my doctor appointment in SJ on Monday). Oh, and on a final note, Becky is surprisingly violent. She punched me in the shoulder, punched my hands, and gave me a nipple twister.

The beginning of the end for Arrested Develpment?

Well, I just heard the news that Fox has put Arrested Development on hold for the month of November and cut back the amount of episodes for the season from 22 to 13. This isn't looking too good. Hopefully if they cancel the show then they'll at least release the third season on DVD. Here is the official story from CBC. Oh, and Krystal, I don't know if I can watch Prison Break now that it's taking AD's place. Maybe I'll get over it though.

Fox is pulling critically acclaimed comedy Arrested Development from its schedule, effective immediately.

Two episodes of Arrested Development aired this week, after a month-long pause, but the run won't be resumed until after the all-important ratings period in November.

The network has cut back on the number of shows it ordered from producers at Imagine, asking for just 13 segments, instead of 22 according to a report in Variety.

This could be a harbinger of worse to come for the comedy, which got a reprieve from cancellation this season because of an outcry by fans.

Arrested Development has won several awards, including an Emmy as best comedy in 2004 and a Golden Globe for Jason Bateman, but has drawn just six million viewers this season.

Batemen plays a dutiful son trying to hold the family real estate firm and his dysfunctional family together after his father is jailed.

Another Fox comedy, Kitchen Confidential, about a talented chef, (played by Bradley Cooper), trying to make it in the restaurant game, has also been put on hold.

It was scheduled to return to Fox on Monday, Nov. 14. Now Fox will air repeats of Prison Break.

Random story from my past.

I just remembered this story the other day and figured it might be interesting for those who I've never told (I've never told anyone actually). Anyways, it was like four years ago (I think I had just finished college) and I was helping my dad paint this fancy house. Unfortunately we had to do all the work while the people were living in the house, which I hate since they watch you as you paint but never mind that since it's not important to the story, lol. Anyways, the family ended up being penticostals, and they had a daughter a year older than me. That's already bad news to me, because my dad loves to poke fun and joke about me possibly dating any girl he thinks would be good for me. Well, that in itself would've been annoying to put up with for the three weeks we were there, but it ended up being much worse. The girl's mother ended up being one of those parents who tries to hook up her daughter with any guy she deems worthy of being a good match. It ended up being the worst three weeks of my life. Well, maybe that's taking it a little far, but seriously, every day this woman would say something to me like "My daughter really needs a boyfriend, you're single aren't you?" or "You're a really nice guy, think you'll be looking for a girlfriend any time soon? Oh wait, Lindsay's single!" with the girl standing right in the room listening. After the first few days I just got tired of being embarrassed so I went into the basement and took my time working down there (don't tell my father that I wasn't working hard!). I ended up working down there by myself almost the entire month it took to finish the job, and frankly I enjoyed it that way. The daughter of the couple was pretty obviously annoyed by her parents trying to hook her up and the entire thing made me very uncomfortable. By the time we finished I felt like cheering as we pulled out of their driveway for the last time. Wait, I did cheer! haha. I'll never forget that time. My father asked if I was disappointed that I'd never see Lindsay again, and I proudly stated "Are you kidding? I'm GLAD that I'll never see her again. I'm a rebel!" Ah, I love irritating my parents. I think it was that experience that made me decide that I never want to date or get married. Just to bug my parents and go against everything that other people strive for. Now I'm not completely against the idea of a girlfriend or wife though.

Arrested Development returns!

After a break of over a month due to baseball playoffs, Arrested Development returns tonight with back to back episodes! It's felt like it's been ages since I last saw a new episode, so to say I'm excited is an understatement. I was so excited that I read the episode plot summary, which I've posted below. Just read it and tell me that this show isn't brilliant. So funny and well thought out.

In the "Notapusy" episode, Rita (guest star Charlize Theron) calls Michael a word that he thinks means "weak or cowardly" when – in the British sense – it actually means "sweet or gentle." In an effort to prove to Rita he's not one of these, Michael tries to convince George-Michael to join him in some manly activities, but George-Michael is too busy prepping girlfriend Ann for an "Inner-beauty Pageant" at the Church and State Fair. So Michael and his recently-discovered nephew Steve Holt enter a triathlon, only to discover Gob is the one who stumbles at the finish line. Meanwhile, George Sr. tries to get some good P.R. by volunteering to speak at a "Scared Straight" meeting, but ends up giving advice about his prison days to the wrong group. Scott Baio returns as Bluth family attorney Bob Loblaw and Dave Thomas as Trevor.

Something else that happened today is I went out and bought Hillsong United's "Look to You" album. After listening to it in Brett's van on the way home from Booster I decided it's time I bought a Christian album. The only Christian CD I currently own is a Switchfoot one, and it's a burned one that J-Ro made me. I figure it's time for me to spend some time listening to Godly music instead of spending all my time listening to secular stuff. I might also pick up some worship albums sometime, since that's what I enjoy more than the typical contemporary stuff.

Just some stuff that's on my mind. I'll get back to the less serious stuff during the week (most likely after I start rocking out with Guitar Hero!

"For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that anyone who believes in him will not perish but have everlasting life." - John 3:16

That's a verse that I haven't really put much thought into lately. I guess it's typical since it's something that I've had memorized since I was a little kid. It's easy to overlook the true meaning of things when they're burned into your mind. But Pastor Dale's sermon this morning really made me think about the cost that was paid for us so that we could live despite the fact that we have all lived sinful lives. I guess I'm still excited from the entire weekend and I know I'm a wreck physically right now too (I STILL feel like I need some sleep). The rest of the service was really good too. And very emotional. They had a really well done slideshow of WW2 pics, and the worship was amazing. I'm not really a very emotional person, but I was struggling holding back tears during a few of the songs. I just feel that I need to be more thankful for God for what he has done in my life, especially over the last four months or so. I can only imagine what he'll continue to do with me as I work with the youth group and get to know the new friends I have gotten to know. This is definitely a reason to get excited and go "AWT AWT!!"